Failure
by Karren
Summary: Steph trys her hand at diffrent hobbies even story writing since she can no longer work.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own anything from Janet Evanovich. This is purely from my brain

Chapter 1

I knew from the moment I walked out of the apartment what I was going to do. I knew I was going to get in a lot of trouble, but right now I just wanted to be left alone, and that's very hard to do living with a bunch of guys trained in Combat and recovery missions. Also their lives depended on never loosing me especially now that I'm seven months pregnant and supposed to be kept stress free as much as possible. I also knew that once the outside mechanic that I had going over my car pulls the tracking device off and I smash it and turn the GPS system off the whole building will go on high alert. Phone calls will be made, Computers will come alive, men in the area will be put on the lookout, and if all else fails they will call him.

Let me give you some background on why I'm going to such extremes to be alone. My name is Stephanie Plum well now Manoso. I finally married Batman and two years later we are expecting our first child. Several weeks ago I went in for my seventh month check up and was told that for the remainder of my pregnancy I couldn't work. I had stopped going after FTA's and Ranger had stopped all involvement in RangeMan activities a long time ago but I still did my desk job running searches, tending to new clients, and sitting in on meetings. Ranger knew he couldn't keep me still, but now that's exactly what I was forced to do and I'm pissed about it.

Please don't get me wrong I love my baby and I would do anything in the world for it, but how this was forced on me is what has me so pissed off. I knew the doctor wanted me to stop working and I told him before I left his office that I would speak to Carlos about it, When I got back to RangeMan from my appointment I stopped off on the fifth floor to see if Ranger was back but was quickly told by Woody that the team hadn't made it in yet. I asked him to tell Ranger when he got in to come to the seven and got a conformation nod from him. I went up to have a nice long hot shower. When I got out I placed Rangers robe around me and sat on the couch clicking the TV on to wait on my Husband.

Ranger got in about an hour later and walked thru the apartment door. I clicked off the TV and stood to welcome him home and to let him know there was something we needed to talk about. When we got married we promised each other to never have secrets between us and that we would work as a team, as partners. When I was going to open my mouth to say what I had to Ranger flew to my side and made me sit down on the couch. Looking oddly at him he told me I was fired.

"What? Fired? Excuse me?" I asked not believing what I'd heard

"Babe calm down, you knows you can't get worked up" he told me

"Not get worked up? You come in here and out of the blue tell me I'm fired?" I asked

"Steph this shouldn't surprise you. Dr. Shawer said no more work because of the condition you now have"

" Yea, ok" I said calming down then remembering I had yet to tell him about what was said in the visit I had with the doctor

"Ranger how do you know what Dr. Shawer said?" I asked and he locked eyes with me

"He called me"

"Why would he call you?" I asked trying to remain calm

"I asked him to. After each appointment he calls me and lets me know what was found out, discussed, and recommended" he revealed to me

"WHAT?" I screeched

"Babe"

"Oh no don't you babe me, why would you do that?" I asked

"I know you Steph" he said going into the kitchen grabbing a bottle of water

"What's that supposed to mean Ranger?" I asked turning so I could talk over the back of the couch

"You are stubborn and if you don't like what he tells you you won't tell me or you tell me half truths of the situations" he said

"I have you know I've told you everything ever since I got pregnant"

"Oh really?" he asked cocking his eye up a notch

"Yes really" I said feeling my Jersey girl attitude coming thru

"Ok how about the recommendation of no more chocolate? and the cutting back on the sweets, and the....."

"All right all right!! But the sweets and the chocolate thing just isn't right, how does he expect me to survive? and Two this isn't about that and you having the Doctor call you after I leave each time it's about we are to work as a team. When I got back I came right to five looking for you to discuss with you what he found but you weren't back. I even told woody to have you come to seven as soon as you come back because I wanted us to sit down and come up with a plan of action to deal with what RECOMENDED"

"Well I just made it easier for you" he said kissing me

"Asshole" I said as he pulled back

I tried to give him my best Burg glare but he just smirked at me and went into the bedroom where I heard the shower turn on. Usually that look would bring men to their knees but not Ranger; nothing scared him well except my grandma. Hmmmm maybe I'll call her and have her over for dinner. Hey I can be devious too!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I ultimately agreed and accepted that I no longer could work. When I went to Dr. Shawer he had discovered the baby was in mild distress and that I had developed a condition where if I became stressed I would most defiantly go into early labor and he didn't want that to happen, Dr. Shawer wanted me to keep the baby in as long as possible so it would be developed better. So over the next few weeks I tried a few things to pass the time.

First I tried Crocheting and by the second day of Ella's patient teaching I just couldn't get it, so I scrapped that idea. Second I tried Knitting, again Ella came up to the apartment and sat with me telling me each step in the process and coached me but I got so frustrated I burst into tears. My third attempt was Cross Stitching. Poor Ella why she didn't just run away ill never know but she stuck right in there with me for the long haul. She knew I was feeling bad about not being able to see the team as much so she went and bought me some flowy black tops and had stitched RangeMan on them so id still feel like part of the team.

Ella went out to the mall and brought back two identical little brown bears to cross stitch. The bear was holding alphabet blocks and I felt it would be just perfect for the baby's room. Again she sat down on the couch, placed the hoop onto the fabric, threaded my needle, and handed it to me. She showed me each stitch. Over the few days we sat there and did it Ella's came out all smooth and neat and you could tell that hers was a bear with blocks, Mine well let's just say I broke into tears because this was the third thing I had tried and failed at . I cried so much and couldn't be comforted that Ella got worried about my condition that she called down on to five and had to have Ranger come up and hold me till I stopped. So strike crocheting, knitting, and cross stitching off the list.

Getting tired day after day of watching Ranger leave for work and coming back late I decided I wasn't going to be locked away anymore. I wasn't on bed rest; I could move and be mobile. I walked over to the table and unhooked my computer and carried it with me to the elevator where I got off on the fifth floor where I sat in the conference room and watched the going on's of the command center. I mostly searched the web for baby stuff and sometimes when the men saw me in there they would stop a few minutes and chat with me. It felt great to be around living people again.

After a week of sitting down on five I got to watching the men. I watched how they laughed with each other, shook hands in that weird fist bumping way. Each guy was different in how they walked and carried themselves soon it wasn't the men that I knew but like characters in a story. This thought gave me an idea on something I could do that may just help me pass time till I give birth. Clicking on my computers notebook I typed my first line.

The Merry Men By Stephanie Manoso

Over the next few weeks I had wrote several "Stories" of many different things, mainly of RangeMan because it was all I knew. I was really into writing and really enjoyed it. I looked around on the web about stories and writing and found a small web board that you could join and post your stories for others to read. I did and posted some of the ones I wrote on the Men. Hours later I got messages back that others had read and left comments. When I went to the board I read all of them and smiled because they really liked them. I wrote more and more and then as I got more experienced I began a story that was bolder than the ones I wrote of the men this one was of Ranger and Me, but of course I changed the names. When I posted I couldn't wait till I got comments back. I checked and saw I had a couple and went to go read them. When I did my heart fell into my feet and I began to cry. They hated it.

All my hard work and it was hated. I went and deleted my story right away and closed down my lap top, and cried. I was a failure; I failed in everything I had tried. So for the next day I thought about those words and went into a depression and I also thought about all the things I can't do and that's why I walked out of RangeMan and got the tracker pulled and turned off the GPS.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

~Back to the present~

I watched as the sleek black car pulled into the lot and parked by my car. I knew who it was even before he got out of the car. When he did finally get out he came to stand with his hands on his hips looking up at me. I knew he was pissed but with me being pregnant and with my condition he wouldn't jump me about what I had done. I watched as he disappeared and knew soon he would be with me.

"Babe" I heard his low tight voice behind me. I turned and looked over my shoulder to see him standing in my old apt bedroom with his hands gripping his hips

"How did you find me?" I asked turning my head back around

"I know you, I've seen you out sere once or twice before. You aren't to go too far and this place hasn't ever been rented yet" he said coming out onto the fire escape and sitting down by me

"No one wants it because they know me and all the stuff that went on here and I guess after all the years that's gone by and our history you do know me"

"So you want to tell me why all my men almost had a heart attack trying to find you today?" he calmly asked me

"I needed to think" I told him laying my back against the building placing my hands over my stomach

"Steph I don't need to tell you that its important to know where you're at, at all times"

"Yea, yea spare me the lecture I've heard it before" I tell him

"Well then you know then why did you take the tracker off and turn the GPS unit off in your car and not tell command you were leaving?" he asked me

"I needed to be alone" I said as the tears started to leak down my face

"Babe" he said bringing me to him so my head laid on his strong chest

I knew he was still pissed. I could feel it radiating off him. He was pissed because I scared him. You'd never get him to admit it but I know once he got the call from one of the men alerting him that I was no longer online, fear and adrenaline spiked and he was on the move and being pregnant and ready to pop and the stress disorder he was containing his anger towards me. I knew too that one of his men would be the unlucky one and receive Rangers wrath tomorrow morning in the gym.

I felt him move my hair from my face and I recoiled and buried my head into his shirt. Ranger sighed and then I heard the rumble of his voice in his chest as he spoke.

"Babe why did you run, why did you need to be alone and think?" he asked me

"Because I'm a failure" I said and he pushed me up to look at me

Ranger placed my face into his hands and looked at me. He was trying to decide if this was a pregnant hormone thing or was I being for real.

"Your a failure?" he asked

"yep a big ole fat failure" I told him as tears squeezed out again and leaked down over his fingers

"Explain"

"I can't knit, cross stitch, crochet, or even write, and I'll probably drive poor Ella so batty she won't ever step foot around me again" I blubbered hiccupping as Ranger looked at me strangely

Ranger placed a hand on the side of my protruding belly and one on my cheek. He leaned forward and laid his lips on mine and kissed me. Soon I calmed and kissed him back. Ranger's kisses always could do and get the results he wanted from me.

"Now Babe since your calmer now tell me about this crocheting and writing thing" he said

" When Dr. Shawer said I could no longer work and you "fired" me I tried a few things to pass the time till the baby came. Ella would come in and try to show me how to knit and crochet and I just couldn't get it, she then tried to teach me cross stitch and I couldn't do that either. Ella bought this bear with blocks and hers came out all pretty and well mine not so much. We stopped there because that's when you had to come up from work and calm me down. Well I watched you then day after day leave and come back and I was so tired of it. I took my computer and started going into the conference room to just be able to be around people and sometimes they'd stop and chat"

"Yes, I've seen you lost in your computer a few time" he said

"Well I was tucked away and could watch all the going ons in the office and all the men milling around and they were all so different, so I began to type up stories with them in it. People liked them and so I got a little bolder and wrote of me and you, now I know what you're thinking and I changed the names so don't worry. Well they hated it, said some things about it and I just deleted it and cried. I can't even do that right, I'm just a failure at everything" I said starting to cry some more

"your not a failure" he said as I stood up over looking my old parking lot

"Yes I am. Think about it. I lost my lingerie job, rolled around in garbage all the time, hate guns, blow up almost every car I own, almost get killed, get kidnapped, always need you to bail me out, didn't become a "Burg" wife, oh and I'm divorced" I said feeling him standing behind me

"Stephanie you're not a failure. You just can't do those certain things you tried but you're by no means a failure. You have accomplished stuff no one else has" he said turning me around to face him

"Yea? Like what?" I asked "if I fail at all those things, how will I not fail as a mother?"

"You captured me Babe. No woman has taken my heart like you have. You married Batman. As for the other stuff you never gave up and when you needed it you asked for help and Babe ill always protect you till my dying breath and even after that my men will step in because they love you as much as I do because you don't treat them like the rest of society treats them. As for you not being a "Burg" wife I don't want you to be. I want you to be you Babe. I want you to do and be what you want to do or be and you are already a great mother" he said

"How the baby's not even here yet?" I asked

"Babe you carried our child safely inside you going on nine months now. You went to every appointment you had to make sure out baby was growing right and was fine. You stopped hunting and when the doctor said no more work you did that too all for the baby"

"Because I love it" I told him

"Right, and Babe you're going to bring our child into this world. Only you can do that Steph, I cant, RangeMan cant only you. I know too that when they lay the baby into your arms you're going to fall madly in love and promise to be the best mommy and you will be Babe because you already are" he said

When Ranger was done I again was crying. Not because I was depressed thinking about all I had failed at thru my life but because I felt so loved. I stepped into his arms and wrapped mine tightly around him. I told him I was sorry for what I put him and the men thru today. He raised my chin so that my face met his, he slowly and deeply kissed me slipping his tongue into my mouth.

"Don't do this again Babe" he darkly said and I knew he meant business. I shook my head in agreement

What Ranger didn't say was you scared me and I thought I had lost you and I couldn't live with that. Ranger helped me back thru my old bedroom window. He placed me into his car and we made our way home to RangeMan. As we pulled into the underground garage I saw all the men standing around watching us park. Ranger parked in his spot and jogged around and opened my door. When he did I heard a collective breath from all the men let out. I got out and stood behind Ranger and peeked around him, everyone looked scared and frazzled. Tank walked up to us and Ranger stood tall to show his protection of me. Tank locked eyes with him and he stepped aside.

"I'm sorry" I said as Tank stood bigger than life in front of me

Tank pulled me into a bone crushing hug. He told me to never do this again that I had scared all of them. I was then surrounded by a sea of men in black all passing me around hugging me. Ranger finally rescued me and made the men stand down, telling them no more stress. He placed a hand on my back and led me to the elevator.

"BROWN, SANTOS GO TO STEPHS OLD APARTMENT BUILDING AND BRING HER CAR HOME" he barked and they moved "THEY REST BACK TO WORK"

While we were riding the elevator to seven, Ranger turned to me and asked if he could read the stories I came up with. Blushing I told him sure. As I booted up my computer when we got into the apartment I clicked my story folder open and motioned for him to sit.

"Remember they are all made up, they are not real, none of this has ever or will ever happen" I warned him

Ranger looked at me oddly and sat down and began reading. While he read I went around doing things in the apartment. I went into our room to change when I heard Ranger talking to someone, opening the door and slipping my night down over me I saw him sitting still at the computer with his phone in his hand.

"SANTOS GYM 0500 HOURS" he demanded

"Opps" I said as I realized the story he was on

"Babe"

"Ranger it's just a story" I reminded him

"Don't worry, I won't kill him to bad" he said shutting down my computer

Ranger came to me, his eyes dark. He picked me up and carried me to our bedroom where he proved over and over to me how accomplished and loved I really was.

The END


End file.
